Wednesday, 19 August 2015

I just might have the good news everyone has been waiting for. You tell me. 3 July 2011 - 6:00pm



Hello everyone,
I’m afraid this is not going to be your typical channelling.  No...this is going to be something different but I’m sure that by the end, everyone will understand why I posted this here.  
I have some questions that I’m looking for answers for.  I believe that this is the best place to get the correct answers.  So here it goes...can anyone tell me...if the Dark forces can get people to lower their vibrations by accepting the illusion they purport as the truth, can we raise people’s vibrations by getting them to accept the truth by disguising it as the illusion that they readily accept?  Does it work that way?  Can we get people to accept the truth more easily if we simply tell them that it’s just a fantastic story at first and then let them figure out that the story is actually the truth later?  Also...we’re all sitting around waiting for something to happen so that we can all move forward.  The Ascended Masters have been giving us advice to listen to our hearts and to act on what we feel our heart is telling us.  Is it just me or does it feel like Humanity has to act and exercise it’s own free will to start this whole process moving forward the way we are all expecting it to?  If Humanity does indeed need to exercise it’s free will then who is going to be the first one to do it and which direction should we all go after that?  Is that all that needs to have happen?  Does somebody just need to go first for everyone else to understand what they need to do as well?
These are the thoughts that are currently rattling around inside me right now.  See...I know that I know how to do something that everyone reading this would like to have happen.  I can destroy the illusion.  That is to say...I believe that I can write a book that people would read, at first, to hear a fantastic story that I tell them is not real.  After that, the story will have a strange way of becoming as real as the reader wants it to be.  We know what happens if you tell someone the truth that they later find out to be a lie.  What happens when you tell someone ‘a lie’ that they later find out to be the truth?  It’s a little hard for me to describe the concept but I have found a way demonstrate it instead. So...I’m writing a book right now.  It’s a special book.  It’s a book that I’m writing right now in my life so that i can discover the ending of the book.  In other words, as I am writing the book, the book is creating its own ending.  I’ve created a presentation first chapter that should explain everything.  First off, please excuse the language.  The main character of the book cusses like a sailor.  It’s awful.  

When It All Came Down

A compelling fictional account of one of the Nines  

Chapter 1

Sunshine???  What the fuck?  Ohhhhh!!!!  
Faintly, the memories of the previous evening come rushing in with brutal force.  Owww!!!!  The hung over condition that I find myself in is the worst.  I look over and see the empty bottle of vodka.  Fuck!!!  Apparently, getting blind fucking drunk still doesn’t solve any of my problems.  But what is one supposed to do when he finds himself losing the girl he loves.  Probably not the best plan though.  Results were not what I was desiring.
The damn Dream again.  It’s been a long time since I’d even thought about the village.  It seems like a lifetime ago now.  But last night...I was there...once again forever reliving the nightmare that had become my life.
Me, Ray, and Crusher...pounding through the open desert at an easy 60 per.  Typical mission.  Other than the fact that we had to drop in pretty far north this time.  Gives us an good excuse to use the sandrail for one mission.  Great piece of equipment.  Two normal seating positions with a third gun turret position on top of the rear mounted turbo charged engine.  And fast...a buck twenty easy.  Of course at that speed, a stone the size of a baseball could send us cartwheeling to our deaths.  Which is why Ray was driving.  He has an intuition that makes it so that he could drive through a minefield and never hit a thing.  Certainly, there have been those times that we all just sat back impressed as he drove us through gunfire without ever getting a scratch.  It was his gift.  Oh wait!  We couldn’t call it a gift.  It was a skill set.  Let’s just say that we all had our own unique and amazing ‘skill sets’.  
It’s December 2000.  We HALOd in and secured the area around the drop.  30 minutes up and online.  5 minutes later, the birds appear on the horizon.  Video and controls are syncing.  And I’ve got them.  20 seconds to impact.  The end of the story...two useless mud huts and the people inside them destroyed with about 100 times more force than necessary.  We were packed up and RTB 5 minutes after that.  With Ray driving, Crusher was manning his traditional position in the turret and I was in the passenger position flying the UAV - our little secret eye in the sky.  We always liked the freedom that the additional flexibility the UAV gave to our operation equipment list.  We could avoid contact with everyone by miles.  It would be several hours of this.  Periodically, stopping to land the bird and refuel.  So much of the same...always...just a different day.  
I had found myself getting lost in my thought as of late.  Six months left of a 10 year nightmare commitment.  Hell!!!  These last 3 years having flown by.  For everything that the military did to keep me doing my job, it’s amazing to me that I’m all still alive.  It’s all very different from when things first started.  Back in 1992, I still believed in the mission and the military’s intent to bring peace to a people that...honestly...deseperately needed help.  More bombs.  More deaths.  More lives destroyed for no other reason than because they just happened to be standing within 500 feet of the guy that we happened to be killing that day.  It always seemed pretty messed up to me but I learned what happens when you start to question military authority very quickly.  It was not the easiest lesson to endure.  Certainly a choice that I would not soon repeat.  No...I’m frankly just going to keep doing exactly what Im told and shut up for six more months.  I’ll be out with no more killing.  No more death.  No more seeing the horrified faces of the men, women, and children as the bird charged forward through the video feed half a second before detonation.  Back to the states for a new life and some distance from this screwed up little piece of the world.  Let some other dumb high school grad with limitless potential get duped into slaughtering thousands and thousands of people simply because ‘we are afraid of them?’
Wait.  That’s not right.  Damn it.  My senses are on fire instantly.  At the same time, Ray drops the hammer on the sandrail getting up to max speed while asking me what I could see.  We could all feel it.  Something wrong.  Very very wrong.  We were heading by our little pet village that had saved our asses multiple times and helped us out of ‘jams’ 10 times more than that.  It had been awhile since we had stopped by so we wanted to see how things were going and that they had enough food and supplies.  Winters could be rough in the desert.
The village - we stumbled on the village about 2 or 3 years after we started operating regularly in Northern Iraq.  Most people thought the Persian Gulf war ended shortly after it began in 1991 but I think that its safe to say that it officially ended on September 11, 2001.  See...I’ve spent the better part of a decade of my life driving planes into building so to speak and convincing myself that the people that were dying were the enemy.  At first, it was very easy.  I didn’t have any attachment to the people I was bombing and most of the missions seemed to be against actual military targets.  At least at first.  Things changed rapidly after we met the people in the village.  It was a mission gone bad.  We were dressed as Bedouin tribesmen.  They are nomadic so it makes it easy when we deliberately avoid contact with others.  We had to go way far out of our way to avoid a major troop movement.  We were low on food and danger low on water.  The camels were useless until we could get enough water for us all.  Still way too far north for an evac.  We had to come up with a plan.  Then the village appeared on the horizon just like a mirage in the desert.  It was completely unbelievable that it was real and there.  As we got closer, the men of the tribe came out to investigate.  When they saw what was happening, they instantly jumped into to help us.  Boys came out with a cart and a camel with water.  They got us all inside and we were feasting on the most incredible food within 15 minutes of our arrival as if our company had been planned for hours.  By the time we were leaving, we had basically made gifts of everything that we had that was of any use to them and we were on our way safely home.  I don’t think that we would have ever gone back either...had it not been for ‘the worst day’.  Since then though, we were regular guests.  Frequently detouring from our missions to visit and spend more and more time there.  The three of us loved the quiet ease with which everyone went about their business.  There were no secrets or concealing between these people.  They couldn’t understand why someone would not be completely honest with their friends, family, and neighbors.  It, to them, was simply a means of survival.  Their way of life.  The days were spent very simply.  The same activities occurring with regularity in a singular effort to make the best life possible for each other.  Everyone here is family.  Everyone spends their life’s in service to the others in the village.  It was an incredible thing to see them sacrificing for each other on a daily basis.  To know what it must feel like to have that sense of security.  Let’s just say that it was incredible to us.  We all learned from them.  Be it the Arabic and Farsi languages or religious and philosophical debate, we all learned and we all grew.  Maybe some of us too much.  Maybe some of us not enough.  With all of things that they were constantly offering to us, we had to discover the honorable way to decline gifts without upsetting the entire village.  We brought them food and medicine.  I spent regular time treating the old and the injured with modern medicine combine with their own tribal methods.  Most of which were surprisingly effective and forward thinking.  Of course, we all had our favorites.  Mine was Akbar, an old man that was allowed to join the village surprising late in life due to some unique life circumstances.  His entire family was killed during the initial attacks of the Gulf war.  He and I would speak regularly.  Mostly, I thought it was to practice my Arabic but now I know that it was to teach me his experiences.  He spoke of the devastating consequences of Tomahawk missile attacks and the effect that they were having on the people as a whole.  One thing specifically that I can remember.  He spoke of how the children of the village would panic and break down in tears for hours when a missile would pass near enough to be heard.  All feared the effect of what one of those missiles would do when they detonated.  All have heard the stories of the planes in the sky that can have killed so many with their destruction.  Everyone has been affected by the death that my job brings.  And yet they still accept us for who and what we are.  To them, we were never the enemy.  No.  We were always viewed as misguided children I think.  Raised in a world that they could never possibly understand.  Why would one let children play games of death?  Why do we allow our children in America such disrespect and violence against others?  Why do we only believe in greed and service to self?  All the unanswerable questions that i was constantly peppered with.  Not out of malevolence but out of a shear lack of understanding.  They no more understood video games than they understood rap music.  They did, however, have a tremendous insight to into how the US military was affecting the lives of the average middle eastern people.  I found this absolutely fascinating that someone so isolated and so seemly uneducated could have such insight into things that our best intel people couldn’t get.  The best part of the village for me was the peace that it brought my head.  I was becoming aware of the very real consequences of the work that I was doing.  Killing thousands of people was taking a heavy toll on my karma.  I was normally in a very dark place inside my head but in the village...my mind was at peace.  I could sleep without nightmares.  I was able to rest without fear.  I guess my mind always understood that it was my one place of solice in the whole cluster that I was in.  No.  Unfortunately, being a Nine meant dealing with a lot of pain that occurred inside my own thoughts.  A moments rest from these thoughts felt like a lifetime of pleasure.  
Oh what my life would be if these crazy missiles hadn’t never come into it.                          
Tomahawk missiles are a fantastic pieces of modern day warfare hardware.  Unfortunately, their 70% accuracy rate and their propensity to blow up baby food factories on accident made them more of a liability than an asset.  At 1.2 million dollars a pop, the people that manufactured them wanted the Navy to keep buying them so they built the ‘Box’.  The ‘Box’ was a device that could control a Tomahawk missile line of sight via an encrypted link.  Unfortunately, it too had its flaws.  It weighed 35 pounds and it was much too delicate for the role that it was going to fulfill.  What they really needed was a bunch of eager young men that had the potential to become SEALs and electronics engineers at the same time.   
Enter the Nines.
The Nines or SEAL (SEa Air Land) Team 9, was conceived to allow for the use of Tomahawk missiles to be used accurately in a counterinsurgency role shortly after the baby food factory incident.  3 three man teams who’s primary role was to get within line of sight of a target, direct the tomahawk missile to its target and get out without anyone knowing they were there.  At that time, I was in the first of what would be many ‘normal’ training courses in my military career.  One day, I was pulled out of class to talk to a man that I had never met.  It was a short conversation.  Yes, I have any uncle that’s a command master chief.  I understand that he speaks very highly of me. Thank you.  Would I be interested in doing a job in the Navy that no one has done before?  Sure.  
After I graduated the school that I was attending, I was transferred to San Diego, CA.  There, I officially attended training on the Close In Weapon System or CIWS (pronounced C-Wiz) and was assigned to a pre-comissioning ship that was in the process of being built.  Officially, we were just normal soon to be ship riding sailors.  Unofficially, we all attended an experimental Basic Underwater Demolition School (BUDS) course with a total of 10 people.  The first thing that was easy to tell about all of us was that we all looked like anything but Navy SEALs - except for Crusher.  Geeks would be the best word to describe the motley crew that showed up that day.  Then we met Petty Officer Brian.  PO Brian had no last name and no markings of any kind anywhere on his clothes.  PO Brian was, however, very much in charge.  It was something that we were all instantly aware of when he appeared.  We spent much of the next hour discovering that we would be a class of trainees that had upper mental abilities that would be valuable to the SEALs.  Therefore, we were going to be offered a chance to attend BUDS and complete all of the training in parallel with other classes but we would have one distinct advantage.  We would not be allowed to fail.  We would be supported and encouraged instead and being beaten up and discouraged.  And I remember thinking that maybe it was just going to be a bit of a cake walk.  A dog and pony show so to speak.  Big oops.  No.  Not being allowed to fail meant that we wouldn’t be allowed to give up either.  8 weeks of nonstop pain and mental torture with only the end of hell week bringing any relief.  It was rough at first.  We sucked.  Bad.  We got our asses beat sun up to sun down to get us up to speed with the rest of the classes.  That process really bound us together and we steadily improved to the point that we were eventually the only boat team ever winning in drills when we were competing against other boat teams.  Didn’t go over very well with the ‘real’ SEALs either.  They didn’t like the wannabes actually pulling it off.  It was another year of training after that before we ever even started doing missions. At first, it wasn’t even that big of a deal.  More like a realistic video game.  Me, Ray and Crusher would get secreted off whatever ship we were riding on at the time to some unknown destination.  We’d get briefed, outfitted, equipped, and armed.  We’d get delivered to the target mostly by extraordinary means.  We’d hit the target and egress as quiet as ghosts.  Debrief and then its off to some conveniently located paradise for a week of liberty (paid time off).  And let me tell you, we pushed the word liberty to its limits.  Hell...we were good at getting into trouble.  Three rowdy assholes that came in, drank all day, started a fight and left with the hottest women there.  It was standard after mission blow off procedure.  Yeah there was a whole helluva alot of crazy, unbelievable crap in the middle of that but that all became very normal too.  They sent us everywhere and we did some of the craziest shit ever.  Excitement.  Adventure.  Defying death on a regular basis only to do something twice as dangerous the next mission.  It was exactly what we were promised.  The fine print is what we all missed.  
Ahhhhh...yes...life within the village always seemed calm...except for now.
My thoughts snap back to the present day.  Before I could even see the village with the UAV, I knew what we was going to find.  A black crater the size of a football field with a random wing or nosecone or tail section or turbofan blade...something that said that it was a Tomahawk and not just another LGB.  I left Ray and Crusher standing at the edge of the destruction to scout the locations that we would have used if we were doing the mission.  Sure enough.  There’s it is.  Chew spit.  I ran back down to the rest of the team.
“It was Rob’s team.” I said to no one in particular.  “What the fuck does this mean, Ray?  This can’t seriously be happening.  Why would they burn this place after the intel that we just got?  Akbar said imminent threat to the continental US.  Something to do with pilots.  How are they going to follow up if they destroyed the source of the info RAY?!!!!!!!”  I took me half a second to realize that I was screaming at a superior before I collapsed.  As tears poured out of my eyes, “Did we really get all of these people killed?”  Crusher was never a deeply emotional guy but it was easy to see the tears.  Ray just looked...lost.  It was several minutes before anyone said anything.  It was Ray that finally spoke.  “This is FOBAR and I want answers.  We’re chocks out.”  Seconds later, we were in the sandrail and returning to base.  We blew off our scheduled evec plan and just drove back.  No one spoke during the hours it took to get back to the base.
Ten years it’s been since that day.  I can’t believe this is all coming up now.  What has my life become?
Well...let’s evaluate.  The night before last, my wife decided that she wanted to be with a famous hollywood actor named Lars Gallahan more than me.  Problem with that is that Lars is quite famous for his ability to corrupt any woman’s values with his money.  He rolls into the clubs and gets a bj from any random cumbucket that would suck his dick then promises them a roll in his next movie.  Of course, they all go home and bang him.  Too bad none of them talk to each other enough to know that he never delivers on that promise.  He symbolizes everything screwed up about Vegas.  I mean seriously, you’d think that a guy that barely survived cancer and had his family rob him blind during the process would find some scruples in his life.  I guess that’s what happens when they give his bitch of a mom the mother of the year award after stealing millions from her own son.  Talk about mommy issues.  Cant wait to see what his karma has in store for him next.  I mean if a bout with cancer cant turn your life around then nothing will.  Now, Mr. What Love Is has my wife in his sights and he’s going to screw her up too.  I wonder if he’d be messing with her if he knew who I was.  It’s education time and I’m the professor in this class.
I wish I could say that this situation was anything but normal for my life.  I guess that’s based on how one defines normal.  Normal is being married to the most stunningly beautiful woman in the world and her name is Beverly Hills.  Normal is a highly modified BMW M3 with lambo doors.  Normal is having a 45 pound pet Serval named Zeus.  Normal is going to Area 51 for advanced psy training and being told that your instructor is an alien.  Normal is a 4 foot tall stereotypical grey skinned alien with a big head and black eyes strolling into class that proceeds to tell everyone in the room basically what theyre thinking. Normal is having sex with hundreds of the most beautiful and sexual woman in the world that most men would give their left nut to be with.  Normal is going to the 2008 AVNs and having the best threeway of my life with Bev and a stripper named Marilyn (to date - still the best sex I’ve ever had).  Normal is moving to Vegas after that and having a bad romance with Marilyn while Bev has one with her fiancee.  Normal is Marilyn/Kristine Jay going into porn after that and winning the award for best threeway at the 2011 AVNs.  Normal is accidentally drinking 3 ounces of GHB in a Vegas hotel room that I thought was water and going into a 36 hour coma cause I cant throw up anymore.   Normal is being able to convert a gasoline powered generator to run on water as it fuel source.  Normal is a 2 year long war with the Las Vegas Metro Police Department that let’s me constantly dick with the police.  So yeah...completely normal based on my life to date.
Now I’m here in the only place in the world that I can find solice.  The ranch.  20 acres, 2 houses, a barn, a non-profit animal shelter, 7 horses, 1 dog and 200+ cats.  Now we arent talking all normal cats.  There’s some monsters here.  Servals, Geoffroys and high percentage Savannahs.  Just the kind of place where Zeus fits in.  Charles and Erin own the ranch.  Bev and I met them about a year ago when we were purchasing a couple of Bengal cats.  I helped them out as much as I could volunteering but it never seemed to make a dent in all of the projects that they needed to have done.  Apparently, it was enough though because two months ago, they entrusted everything they own to us.  
Now Im sitting here in the place that’s going to be my future contemplating my life to date.  See...when I got back to the states, it was not the same country that I left.  Certainly, not the country that I thought I had been fighting all that time for.  Corporations and the government have taken over.  Stripping away everyone’s constitutional rights by putting the politicians in office that create the laws that ensure them a life of opulence at the expensive of the rest of the citizens.  Greed and service to self are now the American ways.  The media sings us all a swan song of white noise information that fills our ears with anything but the truth.  This is not the country that I sacrificed so much of my life for.  This country is broken.  The thing is that I have a gift that enables me to separate the truths from the illusions.  I’ve always had it in my head that I could be the one that could fix our broken country.  It would also be the hardest thing that I had ever done in my life.  Probably why it’s always stayed inside my head.  Now, however, I think that it’s about time for me to start doing everything that I can to save this dying country.  Something inside of me has changed.  The part of me that believes he can fix the country just met the piece of me that believes that he can do anything.  Good news for the home team.  Bad news for corporate bigwigs and skeezy politicians.  Too bad for Lars too.  He forced his way into my life.  Now, I’m making him part of the plan.  Wither he knows or not, he’s going to help me do it.  I just have to figure out the Lars factor.
As you can tell, Im not a writer but that’s what editors are for.  I’m more about telling the story.  Now...in actuality, the book is about half written now.  Even though I don’t know how it ends (technically), I do know that I’m going to end the book at the end of the summer.  Let’s just say that I truly believe that it will be done by then.  Now, of course, if anyone questions me about my book, I am going to say that it is fictional.  I will also say that, inherently, every writer includes their experiences, both real and imagined, in any book they write.  That’s how one creates a story.  The facts of the story being true or not matter only to the reader and not the story.  
Now...what’s my life like in ‘real’ life?  Let’s just say that it’s been a little crazy (one might even say a rollercoaster) but I believe that things are going to start getting better very soon.  First disclaimer that I need to put out...the illusion is going to tell everyone that I am not the person that you should be choosing to be a leader.  That’s just fine with me.  I’m, metaphorically speaking, more of a test pilot on this one.  I mean...doesn’t someone need to be out there believing in and then creating...change.  Even if I am REALLY bad at it at first, isn’t it better than everyone sitting around and waiting for change to happen on its own?  Shouldn’t someone be brave enough to just keep trying anything?
Here’s a letter that I wrote to Holly on Thursday.  Holly and I have very unique lives and have both had many singularly unique experiences - apart and together.  I believe that all that experience has been for a very real purpose that only fate could understand until recently.  This email tells the story.
Holly,
I have to say that I'm still reeling over all that has happened as of late.  It's very hard trying to understand why you feel obligated to put yourself and everyone around you through so much turmoil.  What in your life makes you believe that bringing fear and anxiety into your life while shutting out those that care about you most is the answer?
I know that it's very easy for you to judge right now.  You make all the money.  You have all the power.  Well that's great but look at what you do with the money and the power when you have.  What you don't understand is that there is a better way to live life and that's what I'm trying to do.  A little tough considering that when I'm trying to build something beautiful and new, the people in my life come along and continuously destroy my dreams because...  because they don't believe in what I'm doing.  It makes what Im doing impossible if nobody else is willing to do anything to make it happen.  If we are all going to remain content with the scraps that fall from the master's table knowing that we all could have so much more...
Since I dont have much more to lose on this deal.  Im going to share with you what I understand to be the truth and how I came about my understanding of the truth.
Right around the bad times with Nelson and Kristine (March 2008)...those were some dark days for me.  I didn't like the pain that I was experiencing at the time.  I didn't like the premonitions about the future that I was having either.  I spent a lot of time on the internet for a couple of months and found some things that I found interesting.  The first was on youtube.  A guy was uploading stuff that was obviously written text converted to add the speech and the video.   Komurosan  I originally thought that they were pretty out there but all of the 'people' said really good things.  Always guiding.  Always insightful.  And most of the time, the messages that I was hearing had some application in my life at the time.  You have to understand that there are certain things that my life's experience has shown me.  There are realities that most of the people on this planet DO NOT UNDERSTAND to be reality.  It's always been very hard watching people running through their meaningless existence as they completely overlook the fact that they could choose to be a part of something much much greater.  See...there is something out there.  What you are currently searching for is very real.  You just refuse to search for the answers you’re looking for in the place where the answers are located.  It's hard watching you look for what you want never letting yourself realize that step 1 in your search should be opening your eyes.  Sorry.  Back to my story.  So i'm listening to these videos that are very inspirational but a little crazy and then I hear a video from a Sheldan Nidle.  This guys video catches my ears cause he says things that guarantee that he's been there, done that and he knows knows whats really going on with the world.  Slowly...by listening to what this group of people were saying and comparing it to what I learned about things in the military, I figured out that they were the ones that had shit most right.  And by most right I mean by what my experiences have taught me are the truth.  Now...let's make this part very clear.  It's not the kind of thing that you can just accept and understand.  There are many levels of acceptance of this truth.  I have yet to find all of them.  Here's what I do know for certain.  The human race is living inside of a cocoon of illusion that it has built around itself.  Inside of this cocoon, the world is the way we make it.  Outside of the cocoon, the world is a much more incredible and complicated thing that we can't even begin to understand right now.
The big problem for humanity is that the cocoon is falling apart despite our best efforts of being frightened into subconsciously repairing it.  You are currently very familiar with life inside of the cocoon so let me tell you about what life is like on the outside of the cocoon.  In reality, we are one of thousands and thousands of advanced lifeforms in the galaxy.  There is more life in the galaxy than you can possibly imagine.  There are more ways to exist and live than you can possibly imagine.  You quickly understand the concept of beings that have control over the 4th and 5th dimensions just as easily as we can control where we want to be in 3 dimensions.  You want to go somewhere in this world...you can do it.  It's easy.  You know how.  Well let me tell you that a lot of shit is easy if you know how and once you've practiced doing it so much that it take little to no effort to do.  It's funny that humanity can so easily accept a concept like God even though they don't have any real grasp of the concept and yet miss all of the possibilities for levels of existence that are out there between humanity and God.  It's fascinating to me when I hear others talking about this perfect life that resonates inside of me that tells me that its the truth.
Now what we are missing as we cling so desperately to the illusion that is our life inside the cocoon is that inevitably we are going to have to emerge for the cocoon and accept the way that things are.  So how are the way things are on the outside of the cocoon?  That is a BIG answer.  It's extremely hard to contemplate all possibilities existing but that's basically it.  Thousands and thousands of conscious lifeforms.  All of different levels of thought and existence.  All understanding and sharing and nurturing a balance of existence that has evolved the understanding and learning of eons of generations that have come and gone.  It's this access to this massive amount of collective data that has been recorded for longer than we can understand that makes us different.  The only thing keeping humanity from plugging into that network of existence is that fact that we don't believe we can.  Until we emerge from the cocoon, we cant plug into the big network of existence.  Until we stop believing in the current bullshit that we 'know' is real, we cant accept what is real.
So how would I describe as what's real right now.  Currently, humanity stands at the beginning of an event that is so monumental and rare in the grand scheme of the universe that most of the conscious lifeforms in the galaxy want to witness and participate in it if they can.  What the hell could be so important you ask?  Well it is a very rare occasion when a new race of beings dropping their illusions and emerge from their cocoon with their understanding of their true place in the universe.  We also can't understand what I'm saying because Humanity hasn't experienced that time yet...but that’s what's happening right now.  Some of us are struggling to get out of the cocoon right now.  Most of us are trying to stay in but more and more people every day are trying to get out.  Eventually, the cocoon will break open and there's nothing anyone can do about it now.  It's simply a matter of when.  When has to do with free will.  What we, as a race, do not understand about ourselves is that we are infinitely capable of anything that we can imagine.  In other words, if we truly believe in something then we create it.  Which is why the world is the way it is.  We've all come together with our collective believing and creating and this is what its looking like.  Actually...that's not true.  This world has been created by the few that understand and know the truth of things that keep that information from the rest of humanity so as to gain dominion over them.  The change that is coming is that the truth is coming out and people will soon see that they have been lied to.  Realizing the truth will help Humanity to understand the important things that we should be trying to achieve.  We are trying to become aware of who we are and what our part is in life.  We know that there is a better way of doing things deep down.  We've just gotten so lazy with our thinking that we can be easily manipulated with fear.  Humanity needs to be prepared so that it can develop its consciousness of itself enough to accept that what we believe about ourselves is not real. As a race, we need to stop thinking about what we can't do and start only thinking about what we can do.  We need to start understanding what is possible.  Because once we start understanding whats possible, we'll start understanding that anything that we can imagine is possible.  Only because of what we can only possibly imagine based on our level of understanding currently.  Anything that we can imagine currently can be easily done by another life form somewhere in the galaxy.  Really its all just a matter of knowing how.
Now here's the spooky part.  People like me right now are changing things by exercising our own free will on the illusion.  The only thing that is holding the illusion together right now is fear.  It's taking more and more fear to maintain the illusion and quite frankly more and more people are turning their backs to the things that are producing fear in their lives.  If you happen to know the difference between the truth and the illusion then you can really mess with the illusion as people see it.  That's where people like me come in.  Our intuition drives us to do certain things that ripple out and combine with other events to achieve goals in achieving an increased level of consciousness for Humanity.  Certainly, I would love to increase everyone's consciousness (especially yours) quickly enough to understand that cancer is totally fixable by those that know how.  So...yes to your wild statement about your dad...once you believe that there is viable help for your dad out there, that help, in whatever form it comes in, will come and cure your father.  That I can say for sure.  It's unfortunate that you think that you can't do anything about it.  What happens shortly when the illusion disappears and you have to deal with the thoughts that you were told directly you could have helped your father but you didn't want to try to believe at the time?  When the only thing keeping your father from his cure is you?
Want me to explain?  Allow me to do so.  The cure for your fathers cancer exists and its out there.  Lots of people know about it but they would rather take the answers and keep them to themselves so that they may be able to make lots of money.  That's your reality.  The reality that's 'not crazy' according to you.  So you continue to sit around and do nothing because all you believe is that you cant do anything to help.  Again...your reality.  Now what would happen if you decided that you were going to do anything you could to help your dad?  First step would be to believe in the possibility that there's something out there that could help your dad.  Step two would be to stop ignoring the possibilities that you are discovering currently.  Step three would be to investigate those possibilities and not worry about what your current opinion about them is.
What you don't understand is that the process of disclosure is well underway here on the planet.  It's a three step process.  First is soft disclosure.  That's already happened.  http://vault.fbi.gov/UFO/  It'll take you hours to go through it, of course, but what you quickly learn is that its all documents about UFOs in the 50s, 60s, and 70s that the government once covered up, now they are openly admitting to.  So now I'm officially crazy enough to get the FBI talking about alien coverups on their website.  Next comes hard disclosure.  That is coming very very soon.  Basically, it's government leaders all over the world telling the world's population that aliens exist and we've known about it for a long time.  It's the why they haven't told us for so long that continues to delay things.  Most people in America will be very pissed at the level of secrecy and how corporations were allowed used advances in technology through our contact with other races to profit from exclusively for decades.  Especially since these technologies were given to us for every one to have.  Not for only a few to profit from.  That's also the time the world turns a little bit upside down.  We get massive amounts of actual information after that.  The fact that aliens exist is nothing compared to everything else there is to know.  Money goes away very quick after that because the reasons why people choose to make money will break down.  Energy will be free.  Food, water, shelter, all material things will be easily manufactured without time or effort.  All knowledge will be instantly available to you via a device that is strangely similar to a cellphone in shape and use.  Just way better...the interactive holographic display will be the first giveaway that its a step up.  And everyone will be able to transport themselves throughout the planet and space quickly and easily.  Human interest will change over to learn about ourselves and our true history.  We will start using abilities that are always within ourselves but we were afraid of because we were made to feel badly about being unique or the only one that could.  People will grow and develop themselves the way you and I have spent the time changing our bodies.  A process that takes a tremendous amount of energy and endurance to be successful at achieving any kind of meaningful results.  A process that does however lead to learning how to use the pieces of yourself that are infinitely more complex than the body's we currently reside in.  Our bodies are simply a means that we are using to exist at this time in this space.  Certainly, the energy that makes up who we are after we physically die still exists after death.  We call it the soul.  Everyone believes that they have a soul but no one takes the time to investigate their soul now a days.  It used to be a very popular thing to do.  Also during this time, we are going to find out what's happening with the Earth and what needs to be done to undo the damage that the Human race created.  That and we're all going to help each other with the process of understanding everything that's changing.  The changes will come way too fast for most.  It'll be the responsibility of the ones that can accept and understand the changes most easily to give everyone else the support they need to aid in their transition.  After that is full disclosure.  That will be the easiest part cause we just have to watch the aliens land and say hi to us...without anyone shooting at them.  They won't land and say hi until it is assured that they won't get shot so you know what the goals are now.  After that, I can promise that your dad's cancer will get top priority.  Deal?
How can I promise that?  Its cause I'm famous.  Not famous to the human race.  I'm famous to everyone that's watching us evolve right now.  See...in the real world...there's thousands of advanced races...hundreds of millions of individuals lifeforms...in 15 million-ish individual ships some of which are miles across...just sit up there 'watching' it all go down on planet Earth.  It's the humans like you and i that are sensing the changes and reacting that they all pay attention to.  Best reality show on in the universe right now.  They are the ones cheering for me.  They are the ones routing me onto doing what Im doing with my life right now.  I'm just making that process go as fast as I possibility can.  It is, however, a process that no one can stop and few right now are still attempting to delay.  You should also know that I am not alone in what Im doing.  The people that do what I do call themselves lightworkers.  In other words, we work with light energy.  Youve probably seen the website on my computer more than once.  http://www.lightworkers.org  Yes you need to filter the 1000 foot tsunami crazys out since anyone is allowed to post but I think you will find that you only read the words that resonate with you and you ignore any fear or anger that inevitably pops up. Komurosan does a great job of doing beginner's level filtering but I find great stuff other places on the internet.  Anyway...I think that you would be most interested in hearing from SuLuSa when she speaks.  Also, there was some very amazingly insightful words from Isis in the past two weeks.  You should also know that 'Wanderer of the Sky' started talking at the same time we started having real problems.  And just go back through the  Komurosan uploads for the past two weeks and listen to them.  Each time you listen to one, try to remember what was going on in your life and in the world on that day.  Just see if the words and the insight would have helped you during that time in your life.  See if this information doesn't help you find what you are looking for on your journey now.  I know that I sound really really crazy but you tell me how this is all supposed to happen any other way.  There has to be some people that take the first steps to show everybody else that its possible.  If I knew exactly what I was doing, I would probably be doing a much better job but i'm learning shit that there is no teacher for.  It's been rough going to say the least.  I do have to say that the hardest part has been that the people that I care about most can't see me for the great person that Im trying to be yet.  For a while, I never really pushed my abilities to their limits.  Now, it seems life is pressing me more and more into doing it.  It's scary and mentally exhausting.  I don't like doing it because it's really fucking hard to think about how crazy it all actually seems.  But it, undeniably, is happening.  The cool part is that there are rewards for 'listening'.  I have been having an undeniable number of quirky things happen in my life that reassure me the path im on is the correct one.  Plus...you gotta know the benefits of being one of the leaders that trying to achieve something so great for humanity.  
Right now...the game is such that I have called 'checkmate' on the game that I have being playing.  My opponent doesn't see the moves that I will inevitably be causing him to make for the rest of the game.  This frustrates me because its been a long game.  Ive won and I just want it to be over.  I have to agree to play it out with my opponent and swap moves back and forth until the game inevitably, as I said it would, ends.  My opponent now realizes that I was right when i said I had checkmate and is now just trying to play the last move they have.  Delay the end of the game by making their moves as slowly as possible.  Now eventually everyone watching the game will see that I have checkmate as well and notice that my opponent is just delaying the inevitable and declare me the winner.
Now what I need to ask you is why should I be expected to believe what the world believes?  The world has a pretty bad track record of 'knowing'.  The world being flat was a pretty big misassumption by us.  It's actually easier to think that whatever the world believes in is always wrong since we keep getting it wrong.  Maybe there is a better way.  Maybe there is something worth believing in being able to achieve especially when you believe that believing is creating.  I'm not a bad person for believing in myself and seeing some really big things that I see inside myself.  The world isn't going to end if I try to do something completely amazing with my life.  I mean it would be such a tragedy if i fell way short and ended up only doing something terrific with my life.  Ouch...right?  Well here's what's going to be the hard part for you.  I am going to just keep impressing the fuck out of you the same way I did with the brakes on the car.  You assumed one thing...and then got something totally unexpected.  Keep assuming things about me and I will keeping wrecking those assumptions until you understand me enough to assume correctly about me.  The more time that passes, the more you will see that the direction that I am telling you you want to go on this journey of yours is the right direction.  Any direction you choose other than that direction will not lead to where you are wanting to go.  I can't change that fact.  If you are intent on pushing all of the good things out of your life right now, there's nothing that I'm going to be able to do about that.  And it's sad cause I hate watching you do this to yourself.  You need to start accepting change in your life.  You need to start understanding that you don't know anything compared to the knowledge that exists in the universe.  You need to start trusting that someone is in charge of everything that's going on in your life right now.  There is an inevitable conclusion to what was started when we were created.  Once you can wake up and start accepting the truth of yourself and your reality, things will start getting alot easier.  I promise.  Baby steps though.
First of all, you can't begin your journey by shutting off your connection to the real world.  Carving out all of the good in your life in an effort to fix something inside yourself is a little insane.  You should be bringing as much good into your life right now as you can.  This fear and panic that you constantly have yourself in is a consequence of your own bad decision making.  You shut off your connection to the rest of the world and you've decided that your own thinking alone is best for now.  Your brain is a tool that you body uses to function with you in this reality.  Your brain is not the thing you should be focused on right now.  Your heart is the thing that is in desperate need of attention.  Your body and your mind are as strong as they ever will be.  Why don't you start exercising that emotional and spiritual level inside yourself now?  Maybe you'll just start discovering some of the truly amazing pieces of you that you don't appreciate as much as I do.  It's all in there.  Dormant and waiting to be brought out into existence so that they may be shared and used rather than just stored.  You and I have a lot that we can be doing with our lives right now if we really wanted to.  That much I do believe.  I also believe that we do need to spend a large amount of time apart so that we can focus on ourselves and what we are trying to achieve in life.  I also believe that closing yourself off to me will completely cut you off from what you are trying to achieve on your journey.  If you want to be successful in life, you are going to have to learn to accept all the hope and love you can get in your life.  Make no mistake...there is an opposing side to this game and even though they now know that the game is inevitably lost, they realize that most don't yet and they are going to use that to their advantage for as long as they can.  Keeping people like you and me from moving forward is the only way that they will ever see success in that plan.  You and I are incredibly unique individually.  We will both achieve the most incredible lives separately already.  It's what we can do together that everyone wants to see happen.  You and I have something that we can combine inside of us and becomes so much more than we ever could have done separately.  I cant define it any better than that Im afraid.
I need to make you this offer because I know how important it is.  So for the sake of staying open to the possibility of possibilities...I propose the following:  Six days a week we commit to working our asses off as hard as we possibly can to make the personal changes that we want to make inside of ourselves as fast as we possibly can.  One day a week...we take a break from that and concentrate on the love that we have for each other.  We take a day a week to nurture that love and see what it grows into along side all of the personal change that is going on.  I believe that will make it so that we can both feel hopeful and at peace despite all that we are both currently trying to achieve in life and the chaos that it is creating.  I am going to keep trying and Im going to keep working no matter what.  I know that what I'm trying to achieve seems impossible right now but that opinion will have to change soon.  Besides...I always assumed that you'd appreciate the fact that we waited to actually get married until we could do it in space with the entire galaxy as witness to the event.  That sounds even better than going to the temple if you ask me.  That way we wouldn't have to remember the date...just that we were the first of the human race to do it.  What?  You wanted something special, right?  That's as good as I could come up with.  You can plan all the other details if you want.  As the first of the fully conscious humans, it would be the first time that the commitment in Humanity really meant something more than a legal document that some state made it.  I think that's what would make it most unique and special.  Plus think about the places we could go on our honeymoon with one of those little ships you saw zipping around on the video.  Like everywhere we want to go im sure and let's just say that we'd get a warm reception wherever we went since the world watched us get married too.
You contemplate what I have written.  See if the words don't resonate in your heart to see the possibilities.  Take some time.  Contact me on Monday if you would like to accept the plan and I will see you Tuesday morning after I do the outside pens and then be back at the ranch by 7am Wednesday morning.  It could even be our dirty little secret if needs be.
If not...I'll leave you with these amazing insightful words.
I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright no matter how gray the day may appear.
I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun even more.
I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive and everlasting.
I wish you enough pain so that even the smallest of joys in life may appear bigger.
I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye.
She then began to cry and walked away.
They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them but then an entire life to forget them.
TAKE TIME TO LIVE.....
To the one that I choose to love most in this world,
I WISH YOU ENOUGH........
It is only because I find myself loving you more and more each day despite the challenges that I know that I am truly in love,
Bill
So that’s where my life is at today.  I’m ready to try basically anything to get the ball rolling on this little adventure we call ascension.  Couple that with the fact that fate has arranged my life so that I am currently untethered by the illusion in any way.  It’s time to be bold or risk sinking back down into the lower vibrations.  So here’s some bold believing and creating.
Ascended Masters...What do you think?  How am I doing?  Any direct advice you’d like to offer?  What else can I be doing other than what I’ve been doing?  My apologies that it took me so long to understand that I had to believe in a more direct means of communication before it would be created.  Let’s just say that from now on...when someone channels a message that is, in whole or in part, to Bill/Sinjin, it will be heard.  You should also understand that Holly is now ‘listening’ so you may speak to her directly as well if you wish.  Since she still has to choose wither to accept or reject any advice you give her directly or indirectly, karma is still balanced and we’re not breaking any rules...correct?
Fellow Lightwarriors and Lightworkers...please tell me.  Is this an idea that everyone could believe in?  What if I told everyone that I see the ‘crack in the dam’ that the Ascended Masters speak of?  What if I told everyone that I believe that I could channel and focus enough light energy that you all would direct at me to ‘blow up the dam’ enough to make it unrepairable any longer?  What if I told you all that it wouldn’t even be that tough on you all...just me?  Oh yeah...and this...what does everyone think the Dark Ones will do when they see us beginning to operate as a group force in a creating effort and no longer just pretending to believe?  Checkmate.
Wanderer of the Sky...if you all really want to help out and get in this game...  There is going to be about a million people looking up in Las Vegas on July 4th right before the fireworks.  May I suggest that a little show would be in order right before the fireworks began?  Something like in Western Canada.  Make it a story that everyone could take home with them when they leave the next day.  Something better than we’ve seen yet.  Something...really nice.  And yes...that’s an official request with a representative of Humanity making it.  Is that enough to get approval?  
As for me, I need a day of rest.  Hopefully, this was the good news that everyone, like me, has been waiting for.  I believe that we all could use some hope right now.  As for me...Im ready to move forward with any direction that I am given directly and I will continue to act on my own intuition until then.  
Anyone wanna bet that my life is about to get pretty interesting?
Thanks everyone for taking the time to read a lot of my thoughts,
Bill
PS  Just some random stuff that might entertain everyone a little bit.
Search imdb.com for Mars Callahan
That should give everyone some extra fun stuff to contemplate.
  

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